We are all story tellers: "I am good at this, I am deficient at that. I excel at this, I am impaired doing that. I am enjoying this, I am bored with that." All of our talk- which is largely happening inside of our brains and not even being spoken aloud- directs our ship. What is our ship? Our bodies. So our thoughts and talk are, however subtle, the blue print for the plan and the directions for the voyage.
For example, I have a family member who struggles with sub-optimal oxygen absorption, aka less than ideal lung function. I can hear her: "But Joanna, when I say that I am suffering from pneumonitis, I'm not lying! I'm not making it up. I have been diagnosed. There is a team of medical doctors involved, working on my case. I struggle to breathe. I am on oxygen. It's a genetic defect! I am I am I am...sick"
That may be true, but if our attention is on our 'sickness' and on our sickness 'story', then our cells get the message "that healing is not desired." Our cells get the unconcious message not to heal, because social interaction is facilitated thanks to sub-optimal lung function, so keep up the good work! Even more, thanks to the inefficiency of our bodies' functions, we are loved. Other humans reach out to us and care for us, they express concern and worry over our welfare, we believe, because we are sick. Why would we ever want to heal? Why would our cells understand that we want to heal, when we are so focused on the dis-ease, the misery it causes, and our unconscious manipulation of others to get what we crave: love and attention.
I am guilty of this very thing, and I was shocked to recognize it in myself. It is not a moment of pride to see how we manipulate others to get what we crave with unconscious behavior. We all need love and approval, it is in our nature. Even contrary combative humans crave it from someone, and those of us most strongly craving the love and approval of others are most certainly not giving such to ourselves. Our sicknesses serve us on multiple unconscious levels, even when we hate our malfunctioning conditions.
To extract our misguided flight plan and rewrite our stories, we must first recognize and honor our need for love and approval, starting within. It's not a crime to be sick, nor is it a crime to crave love. We are humans undergoing a human experience. If we unwrap our needs enrobed in dis-ease, we can take the first step of healing which is letting go of attachment. Good old self love, self care, self esteem, self acceptance, unconditionally given, will pave the way.
What if we hate ourselves- because we are sick, broken, manipulative, resentful, vindictive, and just bad? SO WHAT! We can change with just our intention. Self haters may think they are not worth loving or saving, but if you are reading this...guess what? Part of you loves you. If we are unwell, but we are seeking a way free, then we are open to change. The change starts with " I am open to learning to love myself. I am open to loving myself. I am open to forgiving myself. I am open to accepting myself. I am the biggest ever fan of myself. I am awesome, and I am loved, I am whole, I am complete..." Use words that resonate with you. Words do not, in and of themselves, have power, vibration does. When we use language to communicate with ourselves, and we treat our words like holy contracts with us, our cells will listen.
When our cells grasp that impairment is no longer required for the acquisition of love and attention, they can simply return to homeostasis and wellness. The healing of our bodies may take time, as dis-ease often takes years to take hold, but the new blueprint is unfurled and communicated, and so it begins.
With love, -Joanna